


Viscous Fog

by UNICORNZWAG



Series: Definitions [5]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Grand Theft Auto Setting, F/M, Fake AH Crew, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Minor Character Death, Poetry, Switch in Point of View, ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-06
Updated: 2016-05-06
Packaged: 2018-06-06 18:06:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6764491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UNICORNZWAG/pseuds/UNICORNZWAG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Geoff tries to find his definition.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Viscous Fog

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warnings in tags. I apparently like adjectives starting with the letter "V."

 

Geoff's definition questions itself. He trys to make it concrete, but nothing is really concrete in this world. Here is Geoff's definition.

 

* * *

 

 

It’s not for fun… not always.

It’s not attempted suicide (I'd use a gun for that).

It’s not advantageous.

It’s not something that always helps, anyways.

It’s vicious cycle.

It’s when people laugh and say your liver doesn’t have a chance… and knowing it really doesn’t.

It’s knowing that it doesn't  _ really _ matter, you’ll get gunned down anyways. 

It’s the bittersweet taste of scotch, whiskey, vodka, anything sliding down your throat.

It’s a desperation to stop your mind.

It’s flashbacks and memories of everything you’ve done to get where you are. 

It’s broken promises and commitments. 

It’s a the ravaged corpses of a wife and daughter.

It’s a viscous fog crawling through your brain that sometimes doesn’t even help you forget.

It’s trying so hard to function properly for the crew.

It’s when you’re in so deep that you can’t focus without it. 

It’s a crutch. 

It’s necessary now (right??).

It’s when you try not to indulge yourself and end up wasted anyways.

It’s a hurricane of emotions bottled up and corked.

It’s learning to live with a constant hangover. 

It’s not really  _ seeing _ your family standing in front of you.

It’s a heist that goes swimmingly, proving you don’t have a problem.

It’s when you celebrate and everyone joins you at the bottom of a bottle.

It’s forgetting you had a meeting today.

It’s the bounty you have on you for missing the meeting. 

It’s the consequences.

It’s when Jack yells about responsibility, but you can’t hear her.

It’s when Ryan gives you that  _ pity _ .

It’s Ray’s silence.

It’s Michael laughing “ _ Let the guy live a little for fuck’s sake!” _

It’s wondering if this is really living.

It’s Gavin asking one night, when it’s really quiet, “ _ You’re really gonna have another one?” _

It’s the amber liquid to replace the tears.

It’s a stress ball.

It’s everything I need.

It’s not like I’m addicted or anything. 

_ “Denial is the worst kind of lie because it is the lie you tell yourself.” _

_ - _ Michelle A. Homme

But sometimes it’s imperative to survival. 

**Author's Note:**

> This one's a tad bit different. Only one more for the main six in the crew, then I have a plan to connect them all more thoroughly. If anyone has requests for different people to do or things they should struggle with let me know and I'll try to write it. Thanks for reading!


End file.
